This will be your only warning: I may start complaining ridiculously and ungratefully often from this point forward.
OK.
You know that feeling when you swallow a huge hunk of chicken, or perhaps a chip that should have been chewed for a while longer? That "Leapin Lizards, Batman there's a horkin' chunk of living death stuck in my throat." feeling? You know the one? You trot off to find the the nearest liquid to try to wash down that wad of pain? Finally it works it's way either down your esophagus or through your stoma ( I'm not sure which area is causing the pain, really) and you reach that euphoric place on the other side where you DON'T want to rip your own throat out... You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, me too.
Little Man has decided to make his ungrateful little tush right at home. He's managed to wedge both feet under my ribs, snuggling his bottom into my spine. Sounds pleasant, right? As far as I can figure, his new position of repose has somehow shifted/squished the shit out of my stomach so that either the stomach itself is pinched, giving me the lovely sensation mentioned above, or it has maybe somehow pushed my stomach slightly to the side to make way for his tri-atheletic body, bending slightly my esophagus. Either way, You are GROUNDED, young man!! I literally got NO sleep last night. NOTHING helps. I've guzzled gallons of water, eaten every texture of food available in the fridge... NOTHING makes it go away. Handful of Tums? Nope. Prescription Pepcid? Nada. Weeping piteously on the BarcaLounger? I think not. I've even attempted some rather impressive stretch/bend movements in the hopes of dislodging ole' bigfoot there.
Well, at least I'm more limber now.
This pleasant situation is never mentioned in ANY of the pregnancy books I own, of which there are many. If this is the "full stomach" feeling they do mention, I'm coming after them with a big stick. Full stomach, my ass.
How, how, HOW am I going to do this for 5 more weeks? A person dose REQUIRE sleep at some point, ya know.
So. I plan on being extra cranky around nap time today. I may whine and jump around in my bed. A bottle won't soothe me. Perhaps I'll cry myself off to sleep.
Hey, at least I'll be sleeping.
4 comments:
Bummer!!!!! I probably would've thrown my back out twisting into ludicrously inhuman positions. Come on baby - give mama a break and move yo butt!
Yeesh.....really makes me want to go out and make myself one of these......I like Grammabons suggestion, though.....
Sorry Grammabon.. no go on that one.. that is the first thing I tried. He seems to like this position.. comfy maybe?
I had to be induced last time because I just couldnt take it any longer. I wanted to just wait but it was me or her. I was dying! I remember those feelings exactly and now at 13 weeks I am already beginning to dread that last tri even though I doubt it could be worse than what I have experianced so far this tri. I really hope he moves or drops very soon and you wont feel so uncomfy anymore!
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